Motorcycle Forums » Lady Bikers

Need Courage To Ride My Motorcycle

    • Moderator
    • 277 posts
    March 27, 2009 4:48 AM PDT

    Hi Ladies!  As you know, I'm Lucky's wife and I ride on the back of his bike.  For a long time, I have wanted to ride my own.  I took the course and even got my license, but I'm insecure about it.  That's not a good thing to be if you are riding a bike.  Can any of you give me some advice to give me the courage to get back on that bike?

    • Moderator
    • 15715 posts
    March 27, 2009 10:03 AM PDT

    Hey Better half,

    Lucky has probably already told you this but somehow it seems more credible if it comes from someone outside. I know, I was married.

    Having taught an Ex-wife, step daughter and daughter how to ride safely I have some advise. The first thing you have already done, take the safety course. This is VERY IMPORTANT for ALL riders.




    If you have fear of injury or maybe fear of failure or embarrasment it can be managed. It is all a matter of becoming more comfortable with your ride and the act of riding. Success brings on confidence. Start with small steps. (You couldn't play Carnegie Hall after one piano lesson) You must have a two wheeler you are very comfortable  with even if it is a scooter. It is not what you ride it is that you ride. Go out only with one or two other riders that you trust. They must be very patient and willing to work at your pace. Sunday morning in a school parking lot is a good place to do this. Once you do this for a while you will most likely begin to feel better about the riding thing and be ready to venture into traffic. Again, start slow, SO CA rush traffic is a No-NO for rookies. Find a time and place that is much more laid back. Soon you will wonder what all the fuss was about.

    If for some reason you don't overcome the fear then DO NOT RIDE. A scared rider is very dangerous to themself as well as others.

    However you do it, try hard and I wish you the best of luck!! Riding is the best thing you can do with your clothes on.



    Here is my 24 year old step-daughters story. She bought her first bike without even a permit. I test drove it and trucked it home. It sat in the garage for two months until she completed the safety course. It was a 250 Shadow and after 6 months she moved up to an 1100. Now she can keep up with me in the twisties. She was very afraid at first, mostly fear of embarrasment. We drove up and down our street at least 200 times before she decided to go past the stop sign. I am proud as hell to say that last year we did a seven day trip from PA to Maine together.

    • Moderator
    • 15715 posts
    March 27, 2009 10:04 AM PDT
    OK I am not a lady but I had to put in my three cents (inflation).
    • 5413 posts
    April 14, 2009 2:01 PM PDT

    Come on Jason, you have seen her drink.  You know she'd be riding down the street naked!


    • 904 posts
    April 14, 2009 5:55 PM PDT
    HD I couldn't put it any better than Mike did. But I will add this. The more you do it the easier it gets. I feel like each time I mount my baby I get a little performance anxiety. But when I look at how I'm doing today compared to where I was when I first began riding I see how far I've come. And let me tell you, it's quite a feeling being in the driver's seat.
  • g
    April 16, 2009 4:02 AM PDT
    i bet it is adventure girl lol.
  • April 28, 2009 6:53 AM PDT
    I agree with Rex...the courage will come from confidence and confidence will come with riding in a controlled environment. Take it from me, there is no hurry. You can start riding when you are 55 if that's when you finally feel comfortable doing it!
  • g
    April 28, 2009 11:22 PM PDT
    their is loads of GOOD and BAD girl riders ,sex has nothing to do with it ,like their is good n bad men riders ,what i would say is ,just go to ur own pace ..take ur time .i go out we frend most times he has 30 yrs under his tyres hes a good guy ,he knows what i can 'n cant do on ma bike ,so if u have someone like that to ride with then thats a boost.
    • 0 posts
    July 13, 2009 4:35 PM PDT
    The only thing I can say is Ride as much as you can with Lucky on short trips until you get used to it and gain a little confidence. My wife was scared to death the first time on her bike and it ended up costing her as she hit the front brakes with the bars turned at slow speed and it threw her over the handlebars. The only good part was she had to finish the ride to get the bike home. I spent a lot of time with her on short local trips and she slowly gained her confidence back and now she wants to go on longer rides. We are leaving on the 23rd for a weeklong trip to Run21 and the Testy Festy and she is looking forward to it.
    • 126 posts
    July 14, 2009 4:07 AM PDT
    I had my wife ride around the block and area we live in. As she gained confadince she went out ferther and now we have a great time riding togather or alone. She will not let anyone ride on the bike with her but thats ok.
    • Moderator
    • 1507 posts
    July 14, 2009 4:30 AM PDT
    Hey HD, great subject. I have thinking about riding my own bike too. My main problems are that:
    1. I don't have my own bike.
    2. I usually need a DD after each event
    3. I am to broke to pay attention, say nothing about purchasing a bike.
    So I guess for next years New Years resolutions I will have to buy a bike, not drink so much at rallys (yeah right) and make more money. Well two out of three aint so bad.
    So how are you doing with talking yourself into riding your own bike? Any progress?
    I think it would be fun, I have always loved to ride off road, just never managed to try a big bike. I see other women riding and it always makes me want to try it myself. To bad we don't live closer, we would do this!
    So Lucky, what's wrong with Riding Naked?
  • July 30, 2009 1:52 PM PDT
    I have been trying to encourage my wife to take up riding, but she says that she feels uncomfortable riding a bicycle on the street. I keep hoping she will get past the discomfort so she can feel the rush. I have taken her to the motorcycle shop to show her we can get a bike to fit her. She sits on a Blast or a Rebel.
    • Moderator
    • 277 posts
    August 5, 2009 4:11 PM PDT
    I thank all of you for your great encouragement! I just need confidence and to feel like I'm in control. Short rides sounds like a good start, but I still need a bike! LOL
    • Moderator
    • 1362 posts
    August 6, 2009 2:01 AM PDT
    My opinion is that if that IS what YOU want to do for YOU, (getting a bike and riding yourself) Then getting comfortable riding will come in time.... If you are wanting to ride for other reasons I believe that it's going to be tough.....
  • August 8, 2009 9:15 AM PDT
    I wanted to ride since I was 15 but didn't start until 32 years later! Now I have many trips to Sturgis, Canada and many miles (over 100,000) on my cycle seat. It was not easy for me to learn cause I am only 5'1" tall and small but I took the MSF class (twice) and rode in the HS parking lot with my patient husband coach until I could get the courage to ride the road. I have never looked back and know that it is the BEST thing I have ever done for me. I have owned 2 softails, a sportster and a road glide. Right now- my 2005 softail has 40,000 miles on it. JUST DO IT but go slow and build your confidence up-
    • 1 posts
    August 11, 2009 8:34 AM PDT
    All the encouragement here is great, but bottom line HDB is you need to feel comfortable. I have been in lots of group rides, HOG, etc, and it is so easy to spot someone who is not comfortable riding. All the training and encouragement in the world does not fill the void of riding with no confidence. The time will come when you are ready. Just don't let it pass when it does.
  • October 28, 2009 4:23 AM PDT
    Lucky get her a bike, better yeat give her yours and get a new one
    • 466 posts
    October 28, 2009 7:07 AM PDT
    HDBeech wrote...
    I thank all of you for your great encouragement! I just need confidence and to feel like I'm in control. Short rides sounds like a good start, but I still need a bike! LOL

    I started riding my own HD when I was 16 (too many years ago). I took a mans advice and bought a sporty (bad advise for me). After moving on and trying out several types of bikes--I am thrilled to death with my fatboy. I am 5' 9" and have a 36' inseam so I can still flatfoot it with bend in my knees. I do not suggest starting small--go to test rides and just sit on everything available to see what you are comfortable with.  I have also learned the proper way to pick it up.  A woman's strength is in her hips and lower back (carrying babies and such) and a man's is in his upper arms and shoulders(just remember to keep your hands on the bars for steadiness). Test out a few bikes by sitting on them and standing them up with your hips and back and roll it forward and back with just those muscles and your legs.  That will really help you test your comfort.
    Now, my husband has a much shorter inseam than I and never rode before I got him into it. After taking my advise and using my tips to try them out he is very happy with his lowrider.
    As far as a comfort factor goes. I had a couple of good wrecks in my teens and I have basically gotten over them by taking short highway rides by myself or with one other woman--not my male friends--they stressed me out more.
    HTH! Godd Luck!
  • November 27, 2009 2:54 AM PST
    HD I got my softail early summer 09 it took me about 1 month of not allowing anyone to be with me while I practiced only side streets that I was comfortable riding with anyone, My thinking was if I dropped it or messed up I would not be as embarrassed......didnt really think about getting hurt as I only rode about 25 mph LOL Now my husband and I go everywhere. Dont allow yourself to be pressured only do what u are comfortable with and have a blast.
    • 1160 posts
    November 27, 2009 1:50 PM PST
    lilbisket wrote...
    HD I got my softail early summer 09 it took me about 1 month of not allowing anyone to be with me while I practiced only side streets that I was comfortable riding with anyone, My thinking was if I dropped it or messed up I would not be as embarrassed......didnt really think about getting hurt as I only rode about 25 mph LOL Now my husband and I go everywhere. Dont allow yourself to be pressured only do what u are comfortable with and have a blast.

     also remember some of the stuff from the riders edge course ( i also did this aswell) so i understand where your at because i dont have a bike yet either,   good luck,   and Have Fun.

    Just thought I would update this since I now have my bike.  I took it around the local area (25mph or less),  since I live on a dead end road I could practice things I learned in the motorcycles safety course.  It helped to rebuild my confidence and was still fun even tho I was still a bit on the nervous side.  But it towards the end of the first day I had so much more confidence and could not wait to get back on the next few days.  After a week of this I went on a (35mph) road, ran up and back a few times because the traffic is just as bad on it as any others in this small town.  After 2 days of that I was on the main roads with a permanent grin on my face.  But you may be faster then me or slower, just take your time,  be safe,  get your confidence,  then enjoy the ride!

  • December 9, 2009 8:08 AM PST
    There is not much to add here but my 2 cents. I started as a terrified passenger and over a year became pretty comfortable and decided riding gave me the control I needed to fully feel relaxed. I took the course(cant say enough about how important that was) and became a very apprehensive rider! lol What eventually made me a comfortable rider is a combination of these things: a bike that didn't overmount me, a lot of practice on MY terms NOT my husbands, great advise from my husband and the presence to listen to it(not so easy between married people) and finally a big test to overcome(a very long, weather filled ride to the Redwood Run). That feeling of accomplishment when I was done gave me the most confidence of all. Trial by Fire!
  • December 9, 2009 8:50 AM PST
    I Helped my wife to ride by putting her in the backyard on grass with a 79 ironhead. then on parking lot she though the parking lot was to easy after the backyard lol. O did i mention the holes in the yard the dog dug she had to dodge. 1/2 hours on the parking lot and she wanted to hit the road. she started out being to scared to get on it. Her mom pissed her off and she forgot to be scared. Try that ?
  • December 11, 2009 12:02 AM PST
    Wow! Quite an accomplishment, rid'in to the Redwood Run. I always wanted to go, but my wife is too straight-laced to rallys like that. Keep on rid'in - the more ya ride the better you'll get...
  • December 11, 2009 2:25 AM PST
    My first ride was on the back of a friend's Bonneville 750! Scared me to death. Then my sister and I rented a Honda 80 and spent a day riding it around town. My first bike was a Honda CB 450. I practiced a lot on side streets and parking lots then took my rider test. That was a piece of cake as my friend was a good instructor being a trials rider, he knew all the bad stuff that could happen and how to handle it if it did. Since then I have been on three cruisers and riden in all kinds of weather. Nothing speaks loweder than experience and practice, even when you don't think you need it, you can always learn something. This spring I plan to take the Idaho Rider's Course before I begin another season. It is considered one of the best offered in this part of the country.
    • 81 posts
    December 17, 2009 7:08 PM PST
    For Christmas I signed myself up for riding lessons so I can learn to ride my own. the class isn't until March, but I am registered, so I am committed. I'll let you all know how it goes.