Forum Posts

• September 23, 2012 1:55 PM PDT

  in the topic Bikers in Recovery in the forum Off Topic

  Tweek and Gypsy, Thank you both so much for replying and for your words of wisdom and support. Drug addiction is truly heart-breaking and crack and meth are terrible demons. This is so hard for me because he is the only man that I want, I love him with all of my heart. Like most of us who love an addict I have thought that if only I had done this, or that, then he would have been stable, he would have been okay and not went back to drugs. In reality, drugs are a choice each person makes and whatever I do or not do should not influence that decision. I know this but I can't help feeling guilt and deep sorrow over the failure of something that to me was so beautiful. I will move on and I will make a life for myself but right now it seems all but impossible to leave behind the man who is my beloved. I have to make peace with the fact that he will most likely die from his addiction and there is not a thing that I can do about it. I suppose there is some small sliver of hope that by losing the wife that has loved and cared for him so deeply and knowing what a downward spiral he has entered into that perhaps he will seek help. He is in the healthcare system for now so perhaps he will get some help. Again, thank you both, it really helps me to know that someone cares enough to share their kindness and their story.
• September 22, 2012 3:40 PM PDT

  in the topic Bikers in Recovery in the forum Off Topic

  Not really sure where to turn. My life has been an emotional roller coaster for over two weeks now and just when I thought things were getting better my hopes were crashed to the ground. Just over two weeks ago my husband hit an elk on his way to work while riding his bike. Fortunately, he was wearing his helmet, although it did come off in the accident, or he would not have survived. He is hospitalized with a traumatic brain injury, the bones around his eyes broken, all ribs on the left side of his body broken, a shattered wrist and shattered tibia (bone below the knee cap). He has three bleeds in his brain and we are not sure if he still has vision in his left eye. He was in a coma for a week, the neurologist drilled two holes in his skull and he went through two surgeries within 15 hours of each other. Needless to say I have been devastated by this event. The past few days he has made wonderful progress and I was on top of the world ~ until today. My husband has struggled with addiction for 15 years and I have been with him for the past three. I have left him before when I discovered that he was using again and I thought this time that he had been clean for close to a year. Wrong. This afternoon I found a rock of crystal meth on my wood floor while I was cleaning. He knows that is a deal breaker for me and although I love him with all of my heart I will NOT continue to be with someone using drugs. What to do? He needs me now more than ever due to his injuries (he doesn't really have anyone else and he is not completely in his right mind yet) but I don't want to continue to be with him now that I know he is using again. I am so angry right now ~ angry because he almost died, angry because a team of 7 amazing doctors are putting him together again and a small army of nurses see to his care and all this to keep him alive just so he can go back to drugs and end up dying from it. I am so angry at his selfishness. What to do? Anyone with any experience on either side of the issue?
• May 27, 2012 1:58 PM PDT

  in the topic What 's Everyone Doing This Weekend? in the forum Off Topic

  Celebrating my 1st birthday! Last fall died and came back so tomorrow is my first birthday after being reborn into this life. Partied last night with my crew, lunch and shopping with the fam today and more fun stuff tomorrow on my actual birthday ~ I'm having the time of my life!
• April 25, 2012 8:28 AM PDT

  in the topic new to this forum - looking for friends in the forum The Meeting Place

  Welcome Nancy :-) I'm new here too and I think you'll really like this site, great people here. So sad that you and hubby live so far away! We live in Colorado but if we are ever in the bay area we'll look you up.
• April 24, 2012 10:41 AM PDT

  in the topic New helmet or earplugs? in the forum Biker Chat

  I just bought new Bell Apocalypse helmets for my husband and me and they are great! The Apocalypse is a full face helmet but I can still hear the important noises like the bike, emergency sirens, and my husband talking to me when we're at a stop light but I don't hear wind, etc. The great part about it is they were only $120 a piece.
• April 23, 2012 8:13 AM PDT

  in the topic Waving to Other Bikers in the forum Biker Chat

  Hey Blurplebuzz ~ before my husband and I got together I used to ride my bicycle a lot and I always LOVED when bikers waved at me. Made me feel a kinship with them even though the only engine I had was my two legs, my heart and my lungs! Anyway, bicyclists love it when you wave to them ~ keep it up :-)
• April 21, 2012 4:08 PM PDT

  in the topic Bikers in Recovery in the forum Off Topic

  Thank you all for posting your replies, you are true inspirations. The addict whom I love is in recovery (6 months now) and sometimes I still get scared but when I read that all of you have done it it very much brightens my day and gives me hope. ~ Psychedelic, wow, meth! Now I do really have something to hold on to, thank you. You hear stories of abysmal percentages for recovery for that drug of choice but yet here you are. I have a few friends that have been in recovery long term for it, one 18 years the other over 20 so there is hope. You are right ~ we are stronger than we know. Blessings to ALL of you!
• April 21, 2012 1:42 AM PDT

  in the topic Bikers in Recovery in the forum Off Topic

  Hello all ~ your stories are very inspiring to me, you've come through hell and lived to tell about it. Thank you for your wise words as they uplift those still struggling and those of us who love an addict. Does anyone know if there is an 'In the Wind' chapter in Colorado?
• April 19, 2012 4:03 AM PDT

  in the topic Waving to Other Bikers in the forum Biker Chat

  We always wave :-)
• April 17, 2012 3:05 AM PDT

  in the topic GPS for a bike? in the forum Biker Chat

  Thanks to everyone who posted ~ wow, lots of great info! I'm so glad to know that there are so many options. I really appreciate everyone sharing their experiences using a GPS on a bike, we can now make an informed decision on what to get. You guys (and T) are the greatest :-)
• April 15, 2012 2:47 PM PDT

  in the topic GPS for a bike? in the forum Biker Chat

  Thanks T ~ I also use maps but his job sites change daily and so that's why he wants a GPS.
• April 15, 2012 2:18 PM PDT

  in the topic GPS for a bike? in the forum Biker Chat

  My husband and I want to purchase a GPS for use on his bike. We've looked a few places for a GPS specifically for a bike and have not found one. Not sure how to power a regular GPS if we mount it on the bike, it's a 2007 Honda VTX C. I'm sure that people use GPS all the time on their bikes but we're just not sure what to get, how to power it, etc. Any ideas or suggestions?
• April 15, 2012 3:08 AM PDT

  in the topic Do You Wear A Helmet (if not required) in the forum Biker Chat

  We're in Colorado and not required to wear helmets but I always wear mine. My husband is from Florida and almost never wore a helmet before we got together, now of his own accord he wears his helmet. I grew up in a family that rode bikes and my parents were adamant about wearing helmets, especially after a good friend went down on a street bike without a helmet, almost died and ended up with brain damage. Really messed up his life. My husband and I both wear the Bell Apocalypse full face helmet.
• April 13, 2012 3:57 AM PDT

  in the topic Boarder Advice in the forum Off Topic

  I agree with MSG Bigg ~ ground rules or a 'contract' if you will, in writing. This way there is no ambiguity and you will both feel more comfortable. It will make it easier for both of you to communicate if things are off-track and it may avoid some awkwardness. I work with contracted projects all day long and when there is an issue, no matter how contentious, I find that by coming at it from the angle of common ground works best. In the case of a project it would be what is best for the project. In your case, it would be what is mutually best for our continued living arrangement. If you find that the original agreement needs to be amended for the benefit of both of you then you can have that discussion and revise it. There is a reason why we use contracts and written agreements ~ it is not a lack of trust but rather a document that (hopefully) removes ambiguity by giving both parties a standard of behavior and peace of mind. Just remember, it's give and take so both of you should treat each other with respect and understanding. Good luck!
• April 12, 2012 3:52 AM PDT

  in the topic Need prayers and healing thoughts in the forum In Our Prayers

  RaceAngel ~ I will most definately keep Mark and his family in my prayers. Have you received an update yet on his condition?
• April 11, 2012 3:39 AM PDT

  in the topic Riding with One Kidney in the forum Biker Chat

  Jetman ~ it's just crazy that they are still not seeing the bikes, especially the paramedics! Guess we've got to be super vigilant as always.
• April 10, 2012 3:44 AM PDT

  in the topic Riding with One Kidney in the forum Biker Chat

  Trikeman, thanks for your reply. It makes me feel much more confident that some doctors in the situation did not advise against riding. Mine did, rattled off a whole list of stuff I shouldn't do and I can only half remember what the things were. I don't think I am an unusual case as far as kidney removal goes, but I'm guessing that is my doctor's standard spiel. I had an extremely young surgeon (my doc), a little green as far as bedside manner but funny and young enough to push the hospital into going with the DaVinci Robotics system for surgery. I'm not even sure his hands were ever inside my body, only the robot arms while he sat at the game console! (I'm guessing because I was under so far I could hardly come back from the anesthesia so who knows what went on) I am so inspired to hear of your younger brother! At 50 I am finally able to live my life fully without the constraints of children and money (not like I'm rich), etc. I was really down when, just as I was emerging out of my cocoon and finally able to really live, I almost died and then was told to not do the thing that I love so much. Perhaps it was a test for me, to see how much passion I really had for life and living. Guess I passed it 'cause here I am and more free and happy than I've ever been. Good to know that you are in Colorado, yes, we may see you sometime :-) I agree that we are so very fortunate to live in such a beautiful place with breathtaking scenery. Too bad it's illegal to stencil the word POLICE on one's gas tank! Be a lot safer for us if we could, lol.
• April 9, 2012 3:42 PM PDT

  in the topic Riding with One Kidney in the forum Biker Chat

  Hey Highrisk ~ such a comfort to hear your story, really helps to put me at ease, thank you so much! It's good to know of someone in the same situation as me doing so well and still riding, thank you again for responding. Jetman ~ OMG on the whole over-engineering thing :-) I work with engineers all day long, so your story sounds familiar! And you Wooly ~ hope your kidneys are still in good shape after the big bump, lol ;-) Hope your ride was wonderful, my husband and I had a great time on Sunday, can't wait to do it again :-)
• April 8, 2012 11:39 AM PDT

  in the topic Riding with One Kidney in the forum Biker Chat

  Hey Jetman, that is an awesome idea! I've seen what you are talking about and it would be perfect. I already wear a kidney belt but I was also planning on more protection. You are right that it is the others that one must really watch out for, my husband is an excellent rider with many years experience but we have still had people pull out in front of us, etc.... Hope the weather is good on your side of the world, take care and thank you for the suggestion.
• April 8, 2012 3:08 AM PDT

  in the topic Riding with One Kidney in the forum Biker Chat

  Rex and Wooly, thanks so much for your replies and your perspectives ~ there is wisdom in your words and so much goes along with what I have pondered. Wooly thank you for the personal stories. I agree that a life lived in the shadows is not much of a life at all. The info and stories that all of you have shared is just the type of information that I was looking for, not to support a flippant decision but to have what I need to make a sound, reasonable choice. Of course doctors see so many things and they are also constantly aware of law suits from uninformed or otherwise, patients. They must cover their ***es and then some may genuinely care. This afternoon my husband and I will ride again and I'm very much looking forward to our time on the road together ~ hope everyone's day is wonderful also