Home Security

    • 567 posts
    November 21, 2010 11:43 PM PST
    HOW TO INSTALL A HOME SECURITY SYSTEM
     
    1. Go to a secondhand store and buy a pair of men's used size 14-16 Work boots.
    2. Place them on your front porch, along with a copy of Guns & Ammo Magazine
    3. Put a few giant dog dishes next to the boots and magazines.
    4. Leave a note on your door that reads:
     
    Bubba,
    Duke, Slim, & I went for more ammo and beer.  Be back in an hour.
    Don't mess with the pit bulls; they attacked the mailman this morning
    and messed him up bad.  I don't think Killer took part, but it was
    hard to tell from all the blood.  Anyway, I locked all four of 'em in the house.
    Better wait outside.  Be right back.
    Cooter
    • 5417 posts
    November 22, 2010 6:00 AM PST
    Works for me!!!  
    • 0 posts
    November 22, 2010 6:08 AM PST
    I have a 6 foot rubber red bellied black snake at the front gate...No more God bothers with their pamphlets on saturday morning here.............CHEERS BOOF
    • 5417 posts
    November 22, 2010 6:54 AM PST
    Boof, you could probably post that profile picture on your front get and get the same results !!!!
    • Moderator
    • 1516 posts
    November 22, 2010 7:12 AM PST
    You guys are to much!
  • November 22, 2010 12:34 PM PST
    What sucks is that some lowlife would be breaking into the back door and trip over the boots as he was going out th front door with your stuff
  • November 22, 2010 2:42 PM PST
    What's that sayin...."Gun control is hitting your target". And as I have told momma, head for the bedroom closet (farthest from the bedroom door), grab the pump, and remember....Center of mass.
  • November 22, 2010 2:51 PM PST
    Lucky wrote...
    Boof, you could probably post that profile picture on your front get and get the same results !!!!


    That would be enough for me right there boof

    • 0 posts
    November 22, 2010 4:16 PM PST
    Y'all know I'm a loveable chap...CHEERS BOOF
  • November 23, 2010 3:39 AM PST
    I have a sign that says Doxie owner at my front door, that seems to have worked for me over the years.
  • November 23, 2010 4:08 AM PST
    SolarBill wrote...
    HOW TO INSTALL A HOME SECURITY SYSTEM
     
    1. Go to a secondhand store and buy a pair of men's used size 14-16 Work boots.
    2. Place them on your front porch, along with a copy of Guns & Ammo Magazine
    3. Put a few giant dog dishes next to the boots and magazines.
    4. Leave a note on your door that reads:
     
    Bubba,
    Duke, Slim, & I went for more ammo and beer.  Be back in an hour.
    Don't mess with the pit bulls; they attacked the mailman this morning
    and messed him up bad.  I don't think Killer took part, but it was
    hard to tell from all the blood.  Anyway, I locked all four of 'em in the house.
    Better wait outside.  Be right back.
    Cooter

    that is funny as heck how did you come up with that one
  • November 23, 2010 10:17 PM PST
    It also depends on the law breakers being able to read - maybe write it in big printed script
  • November 23, 2010 10:21 PM PST
    wheels wrote...
    I have a sign that says Doxie owner at my front door, that seems to have worked for me over the years.

    I may be showing my ignorance ( no, I am showing my ignorance - maybe because I don't live the US of A ) but what is a "doxy" ?