Motorcycle Forums » Off Topic

Serious Qustion.

    • 7 posts
    February 8, 2013 9:03 AM PST
     Apparently, dating, or any kind of relational interaction, has changed so much...
     I come out, lookin' a lil' desperate.

    Did that get your attention?  Good.  Now, if ya got a minute, seriously, please read on....

    Now, I've never been a particularly shy person.  (No real biker, ever was, feel me?)  
    But, I just don't seem to have "what it takes" , anymore, to get a man to notice me.

    For the most part, that don't really even matter.  I know, that when it's 'posed to happen...it will.

    But, damn.  Used to be, I made men laugh. (the women, too)
    Used to be, we ALL had a good time.

    And you ask me why...
    I want another Harley, soooo bad???

    Cause, darlin's...
    That was the only time,

    I NEVER had to 'splain myself.
    The bike, pretty much, did that for me.

    I MISS THAT.

    Is my ego, all wrapped up in my "biker" persona?  Maybe.  

    All I CAN tell you is this:
    Once a Biker, Always A Biker

    And I love...THAT FEELIN'!!!

    Ride Free
    Tweek

    ***Almost forgot the serious question...lmao
    AM I WRONG TO FEEL THIS WAY?  Riders?






    • 1 posts
    February 8, 2013 9:38 AM PST
    why limit yourself to HD, if you need 2 wheels to make you whole get 2 wheels...surely the make shouldn't be a problem , when its the ideal that saves the soul.
    • 567 posts
    February 8, 2013 10:41 AM PST
    Straight answer to your question: No. You are not wrong.
    But ... lemme ask you this:
    Do you think that when you are around groups of people with bikes (which I take is the social lifestyle you are most frequently interacting with) do you give off an "air" of desperation? We understand that you're yearning to be on your own bike again. But could it be that the male of the species is reading that as some other kind of desperation and automatically shy away from you?
    Just askin ...
    • 7 posts
    February 8, 2013 11:04 AM PST
     Fair question, Bill.  But, actually, I don't and haven't frequented the "Biker" hang-outs, in a while.  And when I did, I was all about playin' pool, and dancin' to some awesome rock by my friends, the "Rogue Patriots".  Yeah, I did hit on one of the band members, one time.  And was shut down so fast, I thought one of us was "gay".  He's young, and HOT.  Did I really think I had a "chance"?....not really.
     
    But, when you're lonely...and gettin' a lil' older...when you think you're done, YOU ARE.
    I chose to think I wasn't, that night.  And that's ok.  
     
    My question isn't if I still have "it" or not.  My question is...
    Do I think my bike or being a biker makes all the diff.
     
    And Yes.  Sometimes.  I think it does.
     
     
     
    Ride Free
    Tweek

    Whadda You think...lol
    • 6 posts
    February 8, 2013 11:39 AM PST
    My question isn't if I still have or not. My question is...
    Do I think my bike or being a biker makes all the diff.


    If it does you have some problems.
    A motorcycle is a pile of metal that.:
    * Goes faster than most of the cars
    * Handles tighter than almost all the cars
    * Takes you places most cars won't go
    * Gives you an excuse to travel
    * Integrates YOU into the ride. - Cars continue on without us but absent us motorcycles fall down
    * Gives you something to talk to other motorcyclists about

    Fishing, duck hunting, sailing and rugby all have communities but doubt any of their members think they are all that different. - Sometimes one joins in and sometimes one does something else

    p.s.: For what it's worth. Today at the gym a 20 something guy asked about wife's 54 year old friend. Seemed quite crestfallen when I told him she was married
  • February 8, 2013 2:06 PM PST
    Heck I guess if you want to be real, I myself have felt that way even in my younger days.I do believe that when you ride your own bike,speaking as a woman wearing grey (crowning strands) you do have confidence in yourself and do exude a very independant air that often speaks louder than words.I do know from experience when you least expect it to happen it sneaks up behind and cupids arrow nails ya in the tush !!!!!!
    • 1781 posts
    February 8, 2013 2:26 PM PST
    Well my Sister I have to roll with blacktop on this one. If someone comes on to you, heck play hard to get, give em something to work for, and again Blacktop is right.......when you least expect it you'll have more than you can handle.
    Life isn't worth a crap with the wrong person in your life, just having someone isn't the answer. It has to be the RIGHT one!
    Keep your head up and smile like you know something no one else knows!
    Dragon
  • February 8, 2013 3:18 PM PST
    You are more than the bike you ride. However, I'm thinking that you really like the biker scene and all that goes with it, including riding your own bike. Just pray for the RIGHT guy, but perhaps a couple of hot right now dudes would get you back in the saddle. Enjoy this life. Our expectations might cause us to be disappointed and frustrated. Just take the joy in each day, follow the Lord as you know this is right, and it'll all work out.
  • February 9, 2013 3:40 AM PST
    If you like being on a bike ...be on a bike it is part of who you are. It is only a part unless I miss my guess there is more to you than that or we wouldn't be having a conversation about it. You define who you are and what you want to become. I think everyone questions who they are at times, I know I have. You are unique You are Tweek. There is someone out there that thinks you are the best thing since sliced bread and you will find them when it's time for you to. I personally think that confidence is sexy in a woman. You have confidence weather or not you are on a bike. Be Tweek and you will find what your lookin for.
    • 10 posts
    February 10, 2013 2:38 AM PST
    Tweek,
    What Woosterbike said "Always be Tweek'!
    I'd love to meet you, girlfriend!
  • February 10, 2013 4:21 AM PST
    You feel the way you feel, regardless of what anyone else thinks about it, it is personal to you, so why ask if it is wrong?
    As with anyone of us, who you are, limits your potential "customer base" and audience - I don't mean that in a bad way, that's just a fact, if all you want is a "Biker" then you limit yourself looking at that group. No idea how you come across, looking for the right person is a quest many are on and few are lucky to find the perfect one. I do agree with you that things have changed a lot in the last couple decades for both sides. What are you looking for? A one nighter? Commitment? Is it a libido or soul / heart you are looking for? If your main or only commitment is your Motorcycle and that lifestyle, are people you meet pushed back by that? Not saying change, if you are happy with who you have become and are, then nobody can ask you to be someone different. Are you willing to compromise if you meet a person if that is required, if so what or how far? Who do you attract at this point? Why? What is romance to you? Are you looking for that? Or more caveman style - smack em over the head and take it from there? If you are looking for romance and hang out with cavemen or vise versa, neither will bring what you are looking for. I know, everyone knows that, so whats the problem... just some thoughts
    • 2981 posts
    February 10, 2013 5:19 AM PST
    Hey Tweek ;) Hugsssssss LOL
    Your a great lady if you have a bike or not !!!
    Dont sweat it so much,just go with the flow :)
    After reading these great responses I would think
    your going to have plenty to mull over,yet in the end
    remember ya got some great family here who care about you :) !!!
    YOUR GOING TO GIT THOSE TOES BACK IN THE WIND,
    HAVE A LITTLE FAITH,!!!.. N DONT BE A SLAVE TO A LABEL!!!!
    HUGSSSSSSS :)
    • 7 posts
    February 10, 2013 7:35 AM PST

    Awesome feedback, Ya'll!  And believe me when I say, I'm gonna be me, (just the way God made me), no matter what the circumstance.  I think, it's just, I'm more comfortable in my own skin, when I'm wearin' cowskin.  Feel me?

    And the bike?  Well, let's just say, it gave me a sense of self-confidence, I found lacking, when I wasn't astride her.
    Don't know why, and I never really questioned it.  I just know, it FELT GOOD.  
    I know, there will be those, who don't understand that logic(?), and that's ok, too.
    But I also know, there's very few out there, that didn't get a little more self-confident, after they had that
    power, under their azzes.  (Was, gonna say...between their legs.  LMAO)

    The proof'll be in the pudin', when I start ridin' regular again.  A lot has changed.  I've changed.  
    And maybe, that's why I started questioning a little more.  Instead of just.."goin' with flow".

    I only want two things, in any man I meet.
    He's gotta LOVE GOD first.  (Which means, he already KNOWS, how to treat his lady!)

    And...(no offense to anyone in particular)
    I'd like him to ride a Harley.

    Those would be the common bonds.  
    And we ALL seek those, in prospective "partners". 

    In any case...
    It'd be one heck of a start!!!

    Rock on, Ride Free
    Tweek


     

  • February 10, 2013 11:14 AM PST
    Tweek, I think you have a twin sister who is my best friend.She is beautiful inside and out;-) Today we went to a biker bar benefit after Sunday services.Once there and sitting outside, she ask my husband and I just what was wrong with her since she couldn't get a date! He & I both loudly stated, "Not a dang thing;-)" She looked dumb founded and stated,"Well I guess I'm unaprouchable?".......Fast forward a couple hours as we were leaving and my friend is blushing coming out the door! She had a man almost twenty years younger beg her infront of his chapter....He was The Pres. 4 her being a pretty lady to get on the back of his bike and ride over to their home turf bar......Well now I'm just gonna call her cougar heartbreaker, cause even though she thought he was adorable she wasn't
  • February 10, 2013 11:16 AM PST
    Into rolling down the road.....I told her not to rule him out;-)
    • 567 posts
    February 10, 2013 11:22 AM PST
    Confidence in YOURSELF. That's all it takes, Tweek.
    • 10 posts
    February 10, 2013 11:39 AM PST
    Tweek, what Black Gypsy said does happen. Don't rule out the way younger guys. Thing is, just like in the PM I just sent to you...the younger fellow never would have met me & asked me out, if i had stayed in my 'normal comfort zone'
  • March 30, 2013 11:57 PM PDT
    I don't see where there should be any problem at all    
    • 7 posts
    March 31, 2013 9:33 AM PDT

    Ok.  First, I just gotta say, once again, Ya'll just ROCK!  The comments and encouragement, are AWESOME!

     When I asked the original question, I was havin' one a my self-imposed "pity" parties.  One, cause I got eclipsed again on gettin' a bike (long story) and two, cause I have some lonely times, and I see all the couple's out ridin' together (each on their own, the way I prefer, but still side-by-side), and I feel like the fifth wheel.  Which is WHY I don't hang out with the "crew", like I used to.  And...truth be told, I ain't gettin' any younger, and as many of you know, when you've stared death in the face a coupla times, you start thinkin' in mortality statistics.  

    I also will tell you, my "standards", have drastically changed.  Yes, I'd like him to be a biker.  No...I'm NOT lookin' for casual.  Long-term, serious, eventual commitment is at the top of the WANT list. A Godly man, who isn't ashamed to say so, and will not make excuses about goin' to church.  (A really AWESOME church, BTW).  And a Harley rider.
     I don't know how to "tweek" rice, I ain't comfortable on it, and IF, I wanted to die a fast death, I'd rather eat a bullet.

     As far as younger men go...I'm not totally opposed, however, I WAS a Cougar in my last relationship, and he ended up straying to the barely adult side of the fence.  So...no, not unless he is firmly entrenched in the first two things on the list.  Looks...ain't important.  But I'd prefer it, if he weren't "prettier" than me...lol  

    Now...at the rist of this turnin' into somethin' this thread wasn't supposed to...let's just say, it was a moment, the night I posted this on the forum.

    And...the moment has passed.  Like I said earlier, God has someone for me, so I'll just wait...on HIM!  


    Ride Free  
    Tweek




    • 1161 posts
    March 31, 2013 10:27 AM PDT
    Yep I'm with ya there Tweek. Most of the people I ride with are married and some times it feels strange to be by my self. Around 3 -6 couples that ride together and some that just ride one bike. I always feel like the third (or 9th) wheel.
    • 10 posts
    March 31, 2013 2:27 PM PDT
    I've been the 3rd wheel in everything, now, for so many years, going on 9 &1/2 yrs., now. Meaning unmarried, otherwise, I'm not WITH a man, get my drift.
    Tweek, I'm wasnt trying to suggest that anyone, necessarily, become a cougar ; (the youngest I've dated, and i mean strictly, casual, was 9 yrs. younger). The 20 yr. younger guy, while he did ask me out, I did not accept. I mentioned that situation, as I merely trying to relate how I had stepped out of my 'normal comfort zone' while it was still a Christian environment, I will not elaborate.
    Oh, well the end of my comments on this topic.
    Moving along back to doing my taxes, now. Ugh!
  • March 31, 2013 4:26 PM PDT
    Just be sure to attract a guy that really likes and enjoys being with you. Not the guy who wants to be with you just for "right now!"
    I was in the HD dealer a couple of weeks ago. I love the 110th anniversary Road King, Switch Backs, Heritage Classics, Softtails, etc. I hope to get a new bike as soon as the house in the former town sells. I like the look and sound of HDs and other cruisers. However, I'm one of those guys that really likes the way sport/touring bikes like the FJR and Concours handle and are comfy. Thus, I've got my sights on something that a lot of bikers won't readily appreciate, but I'll enjoy riding that more than the other options.
    All that said, Just ride what you can, enjoy what you like, and make friends with all bikers that you can, regardless of the image or style.
    Then again, you already know all of this!
    • 6 posts
    April 1, 2013 9:50 AM PDT
    Tweek,
    Quit dwelling on the age thing, there is no predicting in advance how such matters work out & younger male/older female not nearly as uncommon as you think.

    Will tell you a tale; when I told wife that after retirement motorcycles were going to be a much bigger part of my life she got all upset.

    Seeking advice she e-mails her friend who has been married for 35 years to an industrial strength motor-head, 14 years her junior.

    Friend advises her “Don’t let him get a rocket. If you can still get your knees up around your ears don’t waste it on a motorcycle.
    • 1 posts
    April 1, 2013 1:54 PM PDT
    Tweek, I was reading a book over the easter weekend...the grid is down for the count...head service and new rings..bore honed and all that Jazz. But the book..thats what ya do when you get to an age. The book was about bikers down Jacksonville way in the 70's..the locations mentioned in the book, brought back images of my being there last year..I had so much fun...except when it came to riding over those big ass bridges...I wanted to stop on top, and take pics..but didn't have the guts to pull over...Sometimes i wish I were an outlaw so I would feel o'k about doing ratty stuff...but you are seriouysly startying to scare me with this church stuff....Like when I was a kid i got forced to go Sundays...these days I'm a bit hypocritical about the dudes who stand up front on Sundays and preach the lord..then Monday thru Saturday they are out there doing exactly the same thing as everyone else...who says you gotta be under some roof to give thanks...you can just as easy do it from the seat of a bike...keeping your wits about you and being able to read between the lines of traffic and avoiding potentially dangerous situations can be very humbling!
    • 10 posts
    April 1, 2013 3:32 PM PDT
    99Savage wrote...
    Tweek,
    Quit dwelling on the age thing, there is no predicting in advance how such matters work out & younger male/older female not nearly as uncommon as you think.

    Will tell you a tale; when I told wife that after retirement motorcycles were going to be a much bigger part of my life she got all upset.

    Seeking advice she e-mails her friend who has been married for 35 years to an industrial strength motor-head, 14 years her junior.

    Friend advises her “Don’t let him get a rocket. If you can still get your knees up around your ears don’t waste it on a motorcycle.



    99Savage  I really like the advice of your wife's friend!