the dealth of someone i cared about, again passes away!

  • August 13, 2012 1:40 AM PDT
    well i had something terrible happen again! my sons father was in prison, did 10 yrs and was getting out next month, he was finally getting his life in order and was making plans for a better life. saturday august 11th ( day b 4 my birthday ) he passed out in the prison and died! my son was heart broken because he has waited to see his dad walk out and come home. he wanted his father to see him as a man. now this is my 27 yr old son . it broke my heart to know the one man that i married and divorced died, the day b 4 my birthday! we stayed friends and never stopped loving each other, we were very close, no matter what had happened he was a good man! WTF!!!!!!! 6 yrs apart 2 men that i cared about die a day b 4 my birthday and a day after my birthday!!!!!!! makes you wonder.... is it me????
  • August 13, 2012 1:58 AM PDT
    Really sorry to hear about your loss. Stay strong.
    • Moderator
    • 18989 posts
    August 13, 2012 2:12 AM PDT
    SAd to hear for sure Idamae. life is cruel at times to be certain. Hoping for you to find the strength to get through.
  • August 13, 2012 2:31 AM PDT
    Idamae, many things happen in this world that are senseless, its just the toss of the coin.This just happens to be one of them. We can try as we may to make sense but it won't, in time may the memeories bring you comfort and a smile as they flow. My deepest sympathies. "T"
    • 3006 posts
    August 13, 2012 4:33 AM PDT
    Please accept my deepest condolences on your most terrible loss,and for the grief your going thru & for your sons pain.

    The pain will pass in time,its unfortunate that it so happens it falls in a time of the year that you always cherished,dont let those thoughts stain your feelings of joy on your Bday,rather dwell on the good things/times tht did come however brief .
    hugssss
  • August 13, 2012 10:40 AM PDT
    So sorry for your loss of a loved one, my condolences to you and your family.
    • 9 posts
    August 13, 2012 11:07 AM PDT
    I am so sorry Ida. For both you, and your son. They didn't get that chance. Damn. I know exactly how you feel, though. My ex died on August 11, 2001. We remained best friends, despite years of torturing one another in marriage. We were both drug addicts, but his addiction killed him. I guess God had other plans for me, seein' my life NOW. I am kind of grateful that we never had kids together, in some respects, and then I sometimes wish he were my son's father. He would've made a better dad, even with his addictions, than the sperm donor who split after the "deposit"...

    And then I think, why is it, that the good men, (albeit some problems) have to die, when there are other loser's walking around, screwing us over left and right, that should be the one's in the damn ground. I know that ain't
    very "christian" of me, but it's how I honestly feel.

    I'll say a prayer for you both, and your ex. Please don't let what has happened, ruin your birthday, like I did
    with another death, that happened to me on Christmas. God, or anybody else, wouldn't want that for you.


    Ride Free
    Tweek
  • August 13, 2012 12:31 PM PDT
    Prayers over you & your son.....love never dies, it just becomes more cherished with each passing day
    • 2 posts
    August 13, 2012 12:58 PM PDT
    Sorry for your loss - Sympathy for you & your son - The pain dulls - The memories remain

    Don;t attach any significance to the the dates - Mathematical quirk
  • August 13, 2012 11:06 PM PDT
    i dont know what to say.... thank you all but i dont kno how im gonna get thru this....know matter what anyone says.... my heart is so heavy.....
    • 544 posts
    August 14, 2012 6:54 AM PDT
    I understand the saddness and even the anger. All I can say is I hope that you and your son will get through it and be the better for the experience. Losing a loved one is painful enough but to feel your sons loss seems unbearable. But somehow you both will get through it. I send my love to you both. Take care.
    • 314 posts
    August 14, 2012 7:54 AM PDT
    Sorry for yours and your sons loss
    • 580 posts
    August 14, 2012 9:58 AM PDT
    Sorry for your loss Idamae and sincerest condolences. I feel your heavy heart but take comfort in the love and friendship you shared. Hugs
  • August 14, 2012 11:30 AM PDT
    you guys are so kind! thank you sooo much..... im angry an hurt! he was the one person, man that was always there for me. our friendship was forever! a love i felt for him every time i looked at our son! all i can say is god took him for a reason. but im angry he did!
  • August 14, 2012 11:32 AM PDT
    i do know one thing. dont ever put off what you can do today! tomorrow is not garanteed! thats for DAM sure!
  • August 14, 2012 4:30 PM PDT
    There are some things we will never fully understand this side of heaven. This is something that helps me - Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all comprehension, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus (Philippians 4:6-7
    • 1780 posts
    August 15, 2012 4:00 AM PDT
    Life is full of quotes......(1) God doesn't give us more than we can handle. (2) One door closes and another one opens (3) Good things come to good people (4) Everything in life happens for a reason..............I will not use one of those quotes, because life can be tuff as hell, and I don't have Magic words that will make you feel happy right off. Life is easy when everything is going your way, and then something like this jumps out at ya. I think it's a test of ones strength. Just try to survive one day at a time, don't worry about tomorrow. One thing about People .....we all have the ability to bounce back. My life has been so UP and DOWN I can't tell which end is up.
    The one thing I DO KNOW is you have a hell of a support group here on Cycle Fish. Use it to it's fullest.
    Night Dragon
  • August 15, 2012 10:32 AM PDT
    thank you dragon
    • 1855 posts
    August 15, 2012 12:05 PM PDT
    We empathize most certainly lady. We know that when you're waiting for the next door to open, life in the hallway can be a nightmare. Hang tough.


    Peace
    • Moderator
    • 1516 posts
    August 15, 2012 1:48 PM PDT
    Sorry for your Loss.. and no it is not you.. it just happened around you. I had one of my oldest and dearest friends pass away last year on my birthday too.. sucks!! Anyway, stay strong.
  • August 18, 2012 4:11 PM PDT
    thank you
    • 9 posts
    August 19, 2012 12:34 AM PDT
    NightDragon wrote...
    Life is full of quotes......(1) God doesn't give us more than we can handle. (2) One door closes and another one opens (3) Good things come to good people (4) Everything in life happens for a reason..............I will not use one of those quotes, because life can be tuff as hell, and I don't have Magic words that will make you feel happy right off. Life is easy when everything is going your way, and then something like this jumps out at ya. I think it's a test of ones strength. Just try to survive one day at a time, don't worry about tomorrow. One thing about People .....we all have the ability to bounce back. My life has been so UP and DOWN I can't tell which end is up.
    The one thing I DO KNOW is you have a hell of a support group here on Cycle Fish. Use it to it's fullest.
    Night Dragon


    Sweeter, and truer words, were never spoken.  Nice, Dragon.  
    The plain and simple truth, Ida.  We all are here for you, and your son!

    Ride Free
    Tweek

    • 567 posts
    August 19, 2012 12:46 AM PDT
    Ida .. sorry to hear about your loss and the big hole its left in your heart. The same goes for your son. There really aren't any words to make the pain go away. I just hope that time helps the both of you.
  • September 6, 2012 7:11 PM PDT
    thank you sweetheart! we are doing ok...
  • September 7, 2012 1:45 AM PDT
    Idamae, know that across the miles I'm hugging you in my heart-Your not alone !