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Woodpecker Jokes

  • May 29, 2010 6:09 AM PDT
    An Alaskan woodpecker and a Texan woodpecker were in Texas arguing about which state had the toughest trees. The Texan woodpecker claimed Texas had a tree that no woodpecker could peck.

    The Alaskan woodpecker accepted his challenge and promptly pecked a hole in the tree with no problem. The Texan woodpecker was amazed.

    The Alaskan woodpecker then challenged the Texan woodpecker to peck a tree in Alaska that was absolutely 'impeckable' (a term frequently used by woodpeckers). The Texan woodpecker expressed confidence that he could do it and accepted the challenge.

    The two of them flew to Alaska where the Texan woodpecker successfully pecked the so-called 'impeckable' tree almost without breaking a sweat.

    Both woodpeckers were now terribly confused. How is it that the Alaskan woodpecker was able to peck the Texas tree, and the Texan woodpecker was able to peck the Alaskan tree, yet neither was able to peck the tree in their own state?

    After much woodpecker pondering, they both came to the same conclusion:

    Apparently, the farther from home you are, the harder your pecker gets..."
  • May 29, 2010 6:11 AM PDT
    Two tall trees, a birch and a beech, are growing in the woods. A small tree begins to grow between them, and the beech says to the birch, 'Is that a son of a beech or a son of a birch?'
    The birch says he cannot tell.
    Just then a woodpecker lands on the sapling.
    The birch says,'Woodpecker, you are a tree expert. Can you tell if that is a son of a beech, or a son of a birch?'
    The woodpecker takes a taste of the small tree.
    He replies, 'It is neither a son of a beech nor a son of a birch.
    It is, however, the best piece of ash I have ever put my pecker in.'
  • May 29, 2010 6:14 AM PDT
    What do you call a woodpecker who never takes a break?
    A headbanger...

    What do you call a woodpecker without a beak?

    A joke...
    • 1042 posts
    May 29, 2010 8:09 AM PDT
    Those were funny!!!

    Check this link out. This peckerhead ain't so lucky; moral of the story is to be careful what hole you peck      


    http://www.kontraband.com/videos/21267/Woodpecker-Suicide/
    • Moderator
    • 16438 posts
    May 29, 2010 8:22 AM PDT
    He musta thought he had a really big worm huh?? He had guts though, kept going back at it, I gotta admire that.
  • May 29, 2010 8:37 AM PDT
    fxrdude wrote...
    Those were funny!!!

    Check this link out. This peckerhead ain't so lucky; moral of the story is to be careful what hole you peck      


    http://www.kontraband.com/videos/21267/Woodpecker-Suicide/


    Holy crap! Once more it proves that 'the pecker' ain't the brightest part of the anatomy... err, excuse me ~ the avian world... ha ha!