Trooper stories! good, better, and best!

  • February 8, 2012 12:40 PM PST
      GOOD... A Bend ,Oregon policeman had a perfect spot to watch for speeders, but wasn't getting many. Then he discovered the problem--a 12-year-old boy was standing up the road with a hand painted sign, which read 'RADAR TRAP AHEAD.' The officer also found the boy had an accomplice who was down the road with a sign reading 'TIPS' and a bucket full of money. (And we used to just sell lemonade!)

    BETTER... A motorist was mailed a picture of his car speeding through an automated radar post in Pendleton, Oregon. A $40 speeding ticket was included. Being cute, he sent the police department a picture of $40. The police responded with another mailed photo of handcuffs.

    BEST... A young woman was pulled over for speeding. An Oregon State Trooper walked to her car window, flipping open his ticket book. She said, "I bet you are going to sell me a ticket to the State Trooper's Ball." He replied, "Oregon State Troopers don't have balls." There was a moment of silence. He then closed his book, tipped his hat, got back in his patrol car and left.


    • 658 posts
    February 8, 2012 2:59 PM PST
    Talk about a long awkward pause..... Good one
    • 9 posts
    February 8, 2012 10:05 PM PST
    See, I woulda busted out laughing....and gotten the ticket. It mighta been worth it. Buahaahaaahaaaa!

    Ride Free
    Tweek
  • February 8, 2012 11:54 PM PST
    Zing! dam don't ya just hate when ya step all over them ball things! have a great one! "T"
  • February 9, 2012 12:10 AM PST
    A trooper attempts to stop a car for speeding and the driver just increases his speed until he's topping 100 mph. He eventually realizes he can't escape and finally pulls over.
    The trooper approaches the car and says, "It's been a long day and my tour is almost over, so if you can give me a good excuse for your behavior, I'll let you go."
    The guy thinks for a few seconds and then says, "My wife ran away with a trooper about a week ago. I was afraid that you might be trying to give her back!"
  • February 9, 2012 1:27 AM PST
    A couple of high class dudes were driving south on Interstate 95 in their brand new bright green and white El Dorado when shortly after crossing into Georgia a Georgia State Trooper pulled in behind them and turned on his lights. Now these fellows were doing 65 mph. Not 70, not 60, but 65....the posted speed limit. The driver pulled off to the side of the highway, the trooper approached the vehicle and with his nightstick proceeded to tap on the driver's side window...tap, tap, tap....the driver arrogantly reached over and pushed the button to lower the window, and all of a sudden the trooper started wailing on the driver with his nightstick yelling, " When a State Trooper approaches your vehicle you have your window down and your licenses, registration, and proof of insurance out ready to answer any and all questions....DO YOU UNDERSTAND ME?...." the driver was was screaming and crying "Yes sir, yes sir....please stop beating me with that stick!" The trooper backed away and walked over to the horrified passenger side of the vehicle and tapped on his window. The passenger immediately lowered his window and the Trooper began wailing on him with his nightstick. The passenger began screaming, " Stop, Stop...what are you hitting me for...I wasn't driving.." The trooper stepped back and replied, "I'm making your wish come true." The passenger cried, "What? What do you mean you're making my wish come true?" The Trooper replied, " I know you are going to get about two miles down the road and you're going to look at your buddy and you're going to say, " I wish that son-of-a-bitch had hit me with that stick!"
    • 0 posts
    February 9, 2012 7:34 AM PST
    WHEN I WAS LIVING IN NY I WAS SITTING AROUND HAVIN A BEER ONE DAY WHEN A STATE TROOPER PULLED IN THE DRIVE..MY OLD DOG WAS LAYING THERE AT MY FEET NOT PAYIN MUCH ATTENTION TO HIM.HE ASKED ME"IS THAT YOUR DOG?" I SAID "WHAT IF HE IS" HE REPLIED "WELL WE'VE HAD A REPORT OF THIS DOG CHASSIN AN OLD MAN ON A BIKE".i SAID "WELL ITS A LIE"..HE LOOKED AT THE DOG AGAIN AND ASKED"HOW CAN YA BE SO SURE"..I SAID"FOR STARTERS MY DOG AINT GOTTA BLOODY BIKE AND IF HE DID HE COULDNT RIDE IT ANYWAYS COZ HE CANT PULL THE CLUTCH IN OR WORK THE THROTTLE;LE WITH THE ARTHRITIS N HIS FRONT PAWS...I GOTTA CAUTION..CHEERS BOOF
    • 658 posts
    February 9, 2012 4:01 PM PST
    I was working the bus one night last summer and got a call for a car wreck in our area. We got to the scene first and the patient was half in the car and half out. We got the patient placed on a back board and loaded on the bus. We cut his clothes off and had a C collar on him and had him in "full spinal. I was starting the second IV, my partner had just let the air brakes off fixin to head toward the hospital and the back doors of the bus flew open and a tropper stepped up in the truck. He said "are ya'll going to the ER?" The firefighter with me, without looking up said nah, we're headed to dinner wanna go? The trooper just looked at us, then shook his head and got out. Later at the ER he stopped me and apologized and busted out laughing. We've been friends ever since.

    Medic