I am so angry right now, damn you Rusty!

  • June 7, 2012 10:03 AM PDT
    Probably not the right place to post this, but really right now I do not care.

    Lost a brother and dear friend last Thursday, the dumbass decided to get on his bike after he had been drinking and went and killed himself. Speed and alcohol did him in.

    This man had a heart this size of a mammoth, he watched out for me while my husband was away for a year and a half. He made sure I was okay, he called me his ball buster, only because I always called him on his stupid stuff. I just wish I had been there that night he decided to go for a ride.

    What bothers me the most is that his "friend" talked him into going, and when the accident happened the "friend" that was with Rusty left the scene of the accident, and is trying to tell everybody that the cops told him to leave. I call BS on this! He left a brother dying on the side of the road. They were playing cat and mouse on the highway, problem is that Rusty was playing cat and mouse with someone who was new to riding. And we have a feeling that this "friend" pushed our Rusty into the guard rail. Bottom line is that Rusty knew better than to get on that bike after he had been drinking.

    Rusty left behind a son and alot of people that loved him very much, I can't even cry because I am so mad at him. He made a stupid choice and all of us are here picking up the pieces.

    Just needed to vent you all, sorry for the downer. But thanks for listening.

    Please ride safe you all!

    TD
  • June 7, 2012 10:14 AM PDT
    Rest in Peace Rusty, I bet you are giving the Devil a run for his money!
  • June 7, 2012 11:04 AM PDT
    Sorry for your loss.
  • June 7, 2012 11:08 AM PDT
    Sorry to hear that TearDrop AKA BallBuster, I have lost quite a few brothers to absolute stupidity and am always left wondering if there was something I could have said or done! It's never easy and people are not always in control of their better judgment when they're on the sauce that much is for sure!

    I hope that you can find a point to reconcile this within yourself because losing people in your life is most often times cured by some good rational face time and showing them that you care. Some situation are beyond your control but in my world it is universal to hug my brothers and sisters before they redeploy the kickstand and head down the road because in all honestly you just never know if you'll see them again.

    Take care and trust me I think that's what this forum is all about... venting.
  • June 7, 2012 11:36 AM PDT
    its the hard reality of riding. Sooner or later you will be there and take a friend to their finial dirt nap. No matter what we do or say it can happen to anyone at anytime. He was doing what he loved best and for most of us that is most we can hope for. I will light a white candle may Mary help him find his way as he sleep with the angels, and rides like the wind. May you feel the spirit that has passed and know all is well in his new world. He'll be back to check up on you all don't you worry about that. My deepest condolences to his family and much beloved friends.........."T"
  • June 7, 2012 12:49 PM PDT
    im sooo sorry sweetheart for your loss! my heart goes out to you
    • 0 posts
    June 7, 2012 1:10 PM PDT
    I am very sorry for your loss, My deepest sympathy goes out to you, his family, and friends.
  • June 7, 2012 1:51 PM PDT
    You and his family are in my thoughts and prayers...God decided it was time for his appointment...
    • Moderator
    • 19007 posts
    June 7, 2012 3:22 PM PDT
    Deepest regrets and sincerest condolence to you and your family. 'tis never easy.
  • June 7, 2012 4:01 PM PDT
    I'm so so sorry to hear about your tragic loss. Yes! We are all suspect for an accident and crash. May we all do all we can to stay safe when riding. Pray for the guy riding with him. We weren't there, and in the worst of situations, well, I guess we've all done stupid things we wish we could take back.

    Here is something that works for me - Take your broken heart to the Lord in prayer, and ask for God's strength to forgive the other party that left for whatever reason.

    God bless, pour your heart out to Him honestly, you won't knock Him off of His throne. He loves, cares for you, and will see you through this.
  • June 7, 2012 4:07 PM PDT
    My heart goes out to you...I lost my brother the same way.
  • June 7, 2012 7:45 PM PDT
    You only get to die once; surely that beat long term illness. Sorry about your friend.
  • June 7, 2012 8:47 PM PDT
    Sorry for the loss of your dear friend
  • June 8, 2012 12:43 AM PDT
    Thank you all for the kind words!

    I know he is still around all of us, when riding the day after his accident. Put the rear pegs down in honor of him, could feel someone poken at my back and talking in my ear. The voice I heard was his, and can feel him all around me. I have a new guardian angel. Can just see him standing to the side of me, seems like all of the time. He will be watching out for all of us. Espescially his son! Thats who I feel for the most!

    Take Care, Ride Safe!

    TD
    • 2 posts
    June 8, 2012 1:09 AM PDT
    Sorry for your loss
    Know the feeling; a few years ago half a dozen recently graduated young women terminated themselves in an accident while doing something really, really, pointlessly stupid. - 1st thought was "Wish they were here so I could kick their young rumps. - Do they know how many people they hurt?"
    • 658 posts
    June 8, 2012 2:42 AM PDT
    Tear Drops,
      We all have lost good friends and felt the same as you. At first, you can't believe it and then as it sinks in you get mad. It's normal to feel this way.  There are times when we all make bad decisons, some get away with it and some don't. I have taken care of some of my brothers and sisters at the ER and on the truck. I just shook my head and asked "what the hell were you thinking" and the answer was always the same. "I don't know, I guess I wasn't". Bad things happen to good people.
     Please Don't hold on to this hurt in your heart as it will make you hard on the inside. Let it out and give it to God.     As you said, You felt and heard him with you. He is there and will continue to be. Embrace his presence. I'll be placeing you, his son and the rest of his family and friends on my prayer list asking that God will ease the pain and calm the storm surrounding ya'll As you've been told, This is the place for help and happiness my friend. Remember, You did join the family. lol
    Best Wishes,
    Medic
  • June 8, 2012 3:50 AM PDT
    Okay now I am crying! Yes Medic I did join this family here at cycfish. And what a fine family it is!

    Again, Thank you all for the words of encouragement and wisdom!

    Take Care and Ride Safe!

    TD
  • June 8, 2012 3:52 AM PDT
    But I will tell you all this, I have a potty mouth and it was very hard to write the original post without using a few choice words....LOL
    • 3006 posts
    June 8, 2012 4:34 AM PDT
    Sending prayers on your loss. Its never easy or plesant to lose a good friend
    Also would like to extend my condolences to his family,hopefully they can git thru this difficult time ok.
    • 658 posts
    June 8, 2012 4:46 AM PDT
    TD, That's ok, You should have heard me yesterday when a cager decided to turn right on red without stopping or looking. Good thing I wasn't heading to work with my uniform on! LOL
  • June 8, 2012 9:13 AM PDT
    So sorry to hear about your loss...
  • June 8, 2012 9:34 AM PDT
    Who's got a phukN potty mouth?
  • June 8, 2012 10:46 AM PDT
    I do Blackie! LOL I am the daughter of a Truck Driver and he taught me very well, then I had to marry a carpenter and learned a few more. I can even say a few in Portuguese! LOL
    • 1780 posts
    June 8, 2012 4:18 PM PDT
    Tear Drops I believe Rusty knows now how stupid of a stunt that was, but he will right a wrong by being next to you and protect you forever. Keep yourself surrounded by good friends and you will come out the other end a stronger person!!
    God Bless
    Night Dragon
    • 9 posts
    June 8, 2012 7:46 PM PDT
    Words seem inadequate. Tough goin' down this road, I know. I'll be prayin' for you and his family.

    Ride Free
    Tweek